Random Musings

A friend asked me yesterday, 'What's your mother's name?'. I was quite amused by the question, till she told me the reason. The background goes that her grandmother used to make all the grandkids call her by name because with age she realized that there were hardly a handful of people who called her by her first name. This decision of hers, led to all the grandkids calling her by her name. An almost unthinkable thing in any Indian family. But because she had initiated it from the time they were very young, that is how my friend and her cousins addressed their grandmother. When that piece of information sank in, i realized the depth of that question. In a family set-up like ours in India, the relationships overtake names. And especially a lady, once married, would mostly be addressed with a relationship. She would be a 'bhabhi'(sister-in-law),a 'didi' (elder sister), a 'chachi',a 'mami' (aunty) graduating on to a 'dadi' a...

The other day, at a party, i heard a young girl talk about her parents where she mentioned that she had a "motherly-father" and a "fatherly-mother". It immediately struck a chord in me. The roles of father and mother are so pre-set in our minds, that a nurturing, caring and loving role is always assumed to be that of the mother's. While my mother is no less caring, loving or nurturing, my father was an equally involved parent all through our growing years and more inspite of being a very busy man professionally. Today, when everyone is talking about their mothers, it's only appropriate for me to reminisce a little about my father. They say there's no love as unconditional as a mother's love. Being a mother myself, i know that to be the absolute truth. But, i would also like to add, there's no unconditional love like a father's too...for my father was no less than my mother and i celebrate both of them today... It seems strange to m...

There was a time in our twenty-odd years of marriage, when i could have a conversation with my husband, undisturbed...when i did hold his complete interest and attention! Sometimes, these discussions would be about the books we've read, movies we saw, about people and places...the general issues that most people would talk about... What has changed over the years, is this...that now, it's not just the two of us having a conversation anymore! Invariably, Google is the 'other person' in our relationship! We no longer just talk. My husband's stand on any issue is backed-up by Google, if i so much as voice any doubts about his statements! It has become his silent supporter and partner in crime. I can no longer get away with frivolous statements about anything. While earlier, i could assert myself even if i was wrong, there's no getting away so easily now...because Google knows it all, obviously! One time, i was recollecting the early years of our marria...

When i ordered Gurucharan Das' "The Difficulty of Being Good", i chose it because the title appealed to me. Nothing more.  I hadn't read any reviews, in fact i had no background on the book, at all.   It's one of the rare times, where i've bought a book just because the title sounds good.  In the past, when i've made such choices, the only good writing was in the title!  I'm not one to sit in judgement of others' works, but primarily any writing appeals to me only when i can find that connect with it. It was then, with some apprehension that i began reading the book and i'm really happy that all those misgivings and apprehensions were totally misplaced.  On so many levels that book appeals to me...that i'm going over and over some of the lines...And yes, of course, the recurring theme in the book of the difficulty of being good really resonates with me. Yes, i think it is indeed difficult being good.  I think sometimes,  people, circum...